poetry
Men like him are intoxicatingTheir siren like call will lead you Out into the sea Further than you ever dared swim before Until you are over your head — It’s something about their eyes Their- almost always- blue eyes(They really are almost always blue. Right? Right.)But those eyesThose almost always blue eyes They lead you so deep into the sea That no lifeguard could see you if your life depended on it (And of course, it will)And maybe once in a lifetime will a boat Or any sign of rescue pass by But you never noticed (Well of course, you do eventually notice) Just how far you are from shore Or how rarely you ever look through your own eyes anymore But his eyes- Those eyes! Those almost always blue eyes That turn up along with the smile on his lips As his cherry drenched mouth Spills out every promise of forever Like sweet, fresh honey(And forever is all you have ever wanted, after all) When suddenly Above your head Is a large clap of thunder With a sky painted as dark as you have ever seen Reality washes over you. He may call to you like a siren But he will never save you Men like him These intoxicating Almost-always-blue-eyed-men Don’t know how to hold you Wouldn’t know stability if it pulled them down and drug them 60 meters underwater It can’t be him. He will never be your lifeboat (He was never meant to be) But he will make you learn how to swimAnd fight the fiercest current You will never be afraid of another wave In the end it will be you who saves the day. Men like him are intoxicating-But one day, you’ll be sober. 
Golden flecks of the suns beams Wash in through the car windowOnto my porcelain skinIlluminating the realityI am quick to forgetThat this porcelain skinThese white washed handsWill never carry the weight of the burdensMy black siblings have carriedFrom long before they ever breathed their first breathBut you already knew thatDidn’t you?I’m told the lack of melanin in my skin gives me an edgeMakes me betterDeems me first classBut you already knew thatDidn’t you?After all you didn’t search my bagWhen the security alarm went offAs I exited the storeWhen I’m pulled overYou simply tell me, “drive slower, sweetheart”And leave with a wink and a nodWhen I’m walking home from the convenience storeHoodie up, tea in my handYou pull up beside meAnd say “you know, a pretty girl like you shouldn’t be out this late”When I go for a runIn an upper class neighborhoodYou never once questionedWhether or not I belongedAnd if I were left for deadMurdered while asleep in my bedMy killers would already be behind barsProsecuted to the fullest extent of the lawBut you already knew thatDidn’t you?In one nation under GodIndivisibleWith liberty and justice for allNo one has ever onceLooked at my skin colorAnd told meIt was wrongNo one is really freeIf freedom is onlyFor people who look like meBut you already knew thatDidn’t you?
So say itSay what it is you are thinkingSay every word written on your heartAnd say it all againSay it as much as you need toI’ll listen every time I just want to hear from you
Standing in the threshold of today and tomorrow Staring down every uncertainty of foreverWith every step you take galaxies are bornYou do not shrink back your mightYou do not minimize the magnitude of your presence to suit the massesAnd my gosh, how you shine
I have never thought much of myself They have always told me that I didn’t fit inThat I wasn’t good enoughThey have always told me that I was smallBut they never told me that You use smallThey never told me that if I have faith Even as small as a mustard seed I can command that mountain To move from here to thereThey never told me that the mountains answer to YouThe rocks, the trees, the skies too They never told me about YouBut I know You are the peace I have been looking forI know You’re the hope I am desperate for And I don’t know what to say I don’t know where to begin But I’ll invite You inI’m sorry it’s messy in here I’m sorry I haven’t gotten to clean things up I don’t know how to anymore It’s why I need YouI know I’m a little shipwreckedThe waves have always been stronger than me And it reached a point where I let them consume meI’m sorry there are cracks in the wallsThey’re from the last earthquake I haven’t had the strength to fill them inI’m sorry it’s dark in here I keep the windows closedI couldn’t stand to look out anymore The birds don’t seem to fly as high Under poverty stricken skiesI couldn’t stand to hear their cries I know I turned a blind eye I know I have left them to die I’m sorry I didn’t know what to do anymore But I know You are the Savior we have been looking for And if You are Lord over the mountains The rocks, the trees , and the skies too I know I am not a case too big for YouYou take my handsYou look me in the eyes And say You will give me a brand new life That the old me can die So I’ll give You all I have for all You areAnd I know that’s not very much But You tell me that’s all You ask for That You’ll take me as I am So I will bow down to You My anxiety, my depression, my heartache The memories that cripple meMy addiction, my disease, my loneliness, my insecurities Will bow down to YouThey cannot stay in Your presence God of the Heavens You are my redeemer, my rock, my portion forever, my hopeAnd the peace that sustains meThough I am small and brokenYou have made me whole again Jesus my King My Prince of Peace
the clouds ring darkwhispers of memories dreaming of being forgotten fall from the sky crashing they find their home in the dirtin the mud and mire a place not quite forgotten but not exactly where anyone would honestly want to look who would want to get their hands dirtylooking for something that’s not even pretty after all these suffocated memories these pushed back tears have been stuffed away for so longthey had to come out somewhere they had to find an escape route so they jumped from the sky and you can’t really ignore them as they’re falling they kind of demand your attention that wayand maybe that’s why they choose the skybecause for a few minutes at least they will be seen at least they will be acknowledged at least for a moment they will be remembered so still they jump and i don’t know if they knew their impending ending would bleed ugly but they jumped stillhoping you would find them stillthey only ever wanted to be acknowledged only ever wanted to be felt